Breakdown

For months, weeks, days you’ve been falling in love with his surface and his pretty eyes and the way he sees the world as a broken toy he’s determined to fix— and you love the sound of his voice teaching you the Latin names of every wildflower and tree that grows along the river— andContinue reading “Breakdown”

Mad Love

Madness. This is what you want. This is what you hope for crave desire. This is what you’ve never had. You want love to mean necessity no matter what. You want love to mean whatever it takes. You want love to be waiting up for you longing for you searching for you carving out aContinue reading “Mad Love”

Modern Complexity

Days like this remind you how silly it is to get too comfortable with his skin next to yours since you can be turned inside out so easily when he reminds you in an innocent and flippant kind of way that you’re not the only one he loves or likes to please— and because youContinue reading “Modern Complexity”

Just Below the Surface

In a parallel universe or on a future day, perhaps, I’d like to tell you how much I’ve loved the ones who came before you— maybe sit down at the table with the shoebox full of love letters you know nothing about and rifle through my history of loss that made our love possible— andContinue reading “Just Below the Surface”

How to Forgive

I can remember with clarity how much I hated my father after my mother told me that he’d cheated back when I was only five years old and for years I couldn’t look at him without feeling like he betrayed me too even though I read Bridges of Madison County twice and watched the movieContinue reading “How to Forgive”

Choices

One of these days everything about our lives that is hidden and sacred and beautiful will be found out and uncovered and exposed— everything we’ve said and felt and done together will be discovered and scrutinized and judged to be bad and wrong and immoral and depraved and all we’ll have left is the choiceContinue reading “Choices”

Leaving Home

In the beginning I would leave the house feeling as though I was making a big mistake— that meeting him in secret on those winter afternoons was going to satisfy my curiosity but ruin my life if I fell in love with his mouth and everything he had to say— but now, every time IContinue reading “Leaving Home”

What I Want

Very little, really. If one hundred years is too much to ask I’ll settle for another four seasons as long as I can live the way I want to live which is bravely and in sharp contrast to the years I’ve timidly resigned myself to the notion that I am the one who must beContinue reading “What I Want”

Climate Change

You are a bird so high above me seeing it all from your god’s eye view and making fair judgments about how best to keep the sky unpolluted and the oceans cool and contained and I watch you from below with admiration and reverence while my ice begins to melt under your sun and IContinue reading “Climate Change”