Her Eternity

I am watching my mother’s feet
tremble and squirm
under the white cotton blanket
listening to the rusty sound
of her breathing
thinking to myself, this is her wish
this is what she wanted
to live forever.
And here I am
in the goddamn hospital
with a front row seat
witnessing her eternity cut short
hoping our collective pain
won’t last much longer
because the expression on her face
is telling me she didn’t know
she’d ever lose her voice
her mobility or her mind
when she was daydreaming of infinity—
and I didn’t know how conflicted
it was possible to feel
as I hoped the next struggle for breath
would be her last.







DeMaris
6-8-2021

Published by demarisgaunt

I currently live in Greenwood, Indiana. I love to listen to music, books on CD, podcasts or NPR as I work in my studio.  My favorite artists are Andrew Wyeth and Edward Hopper. I love poetry, but only the good stuff that isn’t so abstract I can’t understand it. Abstraction better lends itself to visual art, I think. Stephen Dunn is my favorite poet. He’s said just about anything that can be said about the inner workings of the heart and mind. My favorite novel is Atonement by Ian McEwan. My all time favorite band is The Cure. I love science, and anything that relates to how the mind works. I don’t believe in the supernatural. If I could meet anyone in the world, it would be Richard Dawkins or Steven Pinker. If you don’t buy my art or read my poetry, buy one of their books. It will enrich if not change your life.  My favorite things to do are hiking, kayaking and camping. My favorite food is so common, I’ll keep you in suspense (It starts with a P). I prefer chocolate to vanilla. Green is my favorite color. I have an aversion to planning or scheduling of any kind, and I live for spontaneous adventures! Telephone conversations make me anxious, and I avoid them at almost all cost. I had a happy childhood. I’m having a pretty fantastic adulthood. I have every intention of seeing my 100th birthday, after which I will happily relinquish my guts to the future of medicine. Cheers! ~DeMaris

2 thoughts on “Her Eternity

  1. Has your mother gone to her heavenly peace? I hate that you are having to go through this. My love and prayers are with you all. ❤️❤️❤️🙏🙏🙏🙏

    Like

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